I’m Sorry Miss Jackson or Outkast Stole My Mojo

Ok, I need to vent about how badly my brain is wired here.  Be gentle with me, it is not my fault.

 I had a pitch this week. Stock standard industry pitch too.  Me, a long desk, a panel of execs, wall-boarded posters and a jug of water surrounded by little square glasses that give you about two sips of water which is just enough to stop some people choking on their own nerves.   

So, I am about fifteen minutes into my pitch and things are on track, going well, better than well actually, things are relaxed and these people are asking questions, a lot of questions and the right questions.  All is just rolling along brilliantly, until –

The conference room door opens and a lady, exec, must be, I think to myself because she is in cream suit pants and a crisp linen shirt, shuffles in.  One of the execs stands up, looks to me and says “I’m Sorry, Miss Jackson was running late”.  I nod in acknowledgement as he sits back down, so does Miss Jackson. 

But the damage has already been done.  My brain is already playing the start of that song.  Yes, THAT song.  Inside my head little neurons are popping and starting to nod like that dog in the Miss Jackson video clip and hum melodically to “I’m sorry Miss Jackson…. ooooohhh…. I am for ree—alllll…. never meant to make ya daughter cry, I ap-ol-gise a trillion times”.

See my dilemma?  Most people would just think “Oh fuck, another person to eye me over a desk, another person to say yes or no or get out and go busk on a corner where you belong”, but instead, I bust out a little head hip hop mind jig of some sort and continue to pitch while battling the urge to blurt out “forever.. forever ever… forever ever?”.. 

How the fuck my mind got this way, I will never know.   I do know I finished that pitch.  Eventually.  So next time you are in a pitch and think things are maybe not  going to plan, think of me and my wiring, and know you are better off than at least one other soul.

P.S  I wondered while on my drive home whether I was actually nodding my head.  Like the dog.  I can only hope I was not.

Posted by:  The Kid